Thursday, August 19, 2004

Peace be upon you.

Sometimes life is full of ups and downs.
And when you're having the time of your life.
You tend to forget and thank God for the smiles He gave you.
I did just that.
The past few months have been going smooth for me.
Sure, i pray.
But i did not really thank Him for the smooth life i had.
And i guess,
He's bringing me down to my roots again.

Friends.
There's a saying that out of the hundreds of friends you have
Only five will stick to you throughout your life.
I do not deny the fact that i treasure most of my closest friends
I love them like my own siblings
I cry when they cry
I laugh with them when the time is right
And i stick with them thru thick and thin.
I was so sure
So so so sure
That by treating them with all my love
My heart
My soul
I could find the five people in them.
But i guess
Things don't usually happen how you want them to.

It saddens me,
Day in and day out
To notice that the bestest of friends
Began to call lesser and lesser
Smiles getting almost unnoticable
And even hi's were just grunts.

But what saddens me the most
Is to know
That after all these years
The parents of my best friend
are not really in favour of my presence.

For me
Having the blessings of ones parents
Is the most important factor in having a good life.

Blessings are not what me and her get.

Noone really understands how much a friendship means to me.
They say, the accuse
"Lesbian~"
But none of you knows how it feels like
To be through so much in life with a friend
That you feel indebted
You feel as though you owe her your life itself.

Due to time and circumstances.
We have drifted apart.

I used to struggle.
Rage against the dying of the light.
Trying to bring back the memories of us.
Trying to keep us alive,
Somewhere in our hearts.

But now.

Now brings a different story.

I see the sadness in her eyes.
Yet theres nothing i can do.
My heart aches,
knowing all the turmoil she's going through.

But theres nothing i can do.

Why?

Cuz my parents forbade me to go out with her.
And even hers.

It pains me,
That after all these years
Their trust i have not gained.

And now.










Emptiness resides in the place in my heart










The place where she used to sat.









A song i got today.
The same one playing in the background.
A*grade for emo-ing to,
That is, if Malay is your Bahasa.
If its not,
Apologies.
Yes Lizzy, im sorry.
Haha.

Kasih tak sampai - Padi.

Indah..
Terasa indah..
Bila kita terbuai dalam alunan cinta..
Sedapat mungkin terciptakan rasa..
Keinginan saling memiliki

Namun bila,
Itu semua dapat terwujud
Dalam satu ikatan cinta
Tak semudah seperti yang pernah terbayang..
Menyatukan perasaan....

Chorus:
Tetaplah menjadi bintang dilangit
Agar cinta kita akan abadi
Biarlah sinarmu tetap menyinari alam ini,
Agar menjadi saksi cinta kita
Berdua...
Berdua..

Sudah..
Lambat sudah...
Kini semua harus berakhir
Mungkin inilah jalan yang terbaik
Dan kita mesti relakan kenyataan ini...

Love,
Emo factor right now : 10/10.