Mom and Dad are away in some relative's chalet at Costa Sands. Oh why didnt i follow suit? Nyeh. i feel a bout of pms coming about.

Did i mention i spent today's evening crying in front of the telly cuz i was watching some Hindi show? I was speculating a happy colorful ending (thats what all Hindi movies are made of), but instead i got a sombre monotonous one. Boohoo.

I wet 1/5 of my pillow with warm tears watching Salman Khan disintegrate into a state of mindlessness upon seeing his beloved lying dead before him; all his efforts of running away from the asylum put to waste. So romantic (in a very twisted saddist way). I am a sucker for romance *hint*.

I am horribly gross when it comes to Art. I spent an hour of my afternoon trying to make a card, and i ended up throwing everything away and sinking into depression for a good 30mins. I suck at Art. Will someone please help me?

4th entry for today. I think ive gone bonkers. Or perhaps im just bored. sigh. Oh and ive discovered something today

Noone can be perfect. Not me. Not you. Not him. Not her. All of us are retarded in some ways.

I AM NOT A RACIST LAH.

I was watching the High On Life show on channel 5, and was miffed when i noticed that Sly the AhBeng performed twice and there were 5 cinone songs being played out and not one Malay or Indian song.

Dear Mediacorp, Taufik singing an English song does NOT make it a Malay number and(something) Masala playing a drum beat does NOT it an Indian number (yes we all know that Masala in an Indian food or something, but that does NOT make it an indian number). Pfft.

So anyway, some cinone (again) performance is being held at the hall opposite my block, and i really cant stand the whiny cinone opera voices as well as the whiny kids singing whiny songs at the top of their whiny lungs. STOP IT LAH. argh.

Am i giving off bad vibes? heh. Im in an ok mood actually, just being miffed about the cinone thingys.

Its like the CC at my area was holding a supposedly multi-racial new year celebration event last year, and so me and my brother bought tix to attend it. Heck yeah there's halal food, but they were hosting the show in mandarin and having cinone opera singing 24-7. And we paid for that? BAH. so much for being multiracial. and this year the whole thing was a flop. the event started at 730 and my dad said at at 745 he saw only a few ahpeks and nonyas walking about. BAH! Serves them right!

Oops i sound like a racist. i am not. i love claire. See im not a racist. The fact that she's a pig even prove how unracist i am. im blabbering im blabbering. i'd better stop before i do more damage.

My sec 2 brother doesnt know how to spell "Hair". Like oh my God. thats sooo pathetic. So anyway, Kimi, my guy best-fren, smsed me just now

"Eh you not going to the CSS Malay gathering next Friday?"

And to which, of course, the answer is a No due to the fact that im going KL on Thursday night all the way till Sunday. To that, he replied

"Alaaahh (whiny tone). Dont have you then its not the same lah."

He then called me, and chatted with me for the next 10 mins. I told him to get off the phone cuz he was actually on a family outing, but he refused to do so. Apparently he said its been so long since he had last conversed with me, which actually meant that he misses me.

I feel loved. hehehe.

I like watering my Mom's plants early in the morning (by early i meant 10am).

I'd feel the morning wind caressing my hair and face, whispering to the plants and the sunshine just lightly beating down my back. Then i'd feel the cool water dripping down my hand and legs, and i'd here the tss tss-ing of the swaying leaves rubbing against one another. The awakening of my five senses just by a mere action of watering the plants early in the morning never fails to make me smile.

Gasp its a Saturday afternoon and im blogging at home? hahaha. Told ya mom was angry at my going out every single day from morning till night. So yeah, im kinda grounded. pfft.

i hate my hair. pfft. oh wait i blogged about that already. So lets move on in life. hahaha.

After washing my hair, it when kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. I want to kill myself. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot. My hair went kapoot.

PFFT.

Reply to Tags

Ain: hahhaa. my bf no twin lah. but got sister. u want his sister? and thanks for the well wishes beb. amin. oh oh! u saw me today? wat was i wearing? maybe its me. hehehe. knapa tak tegur?

Ashrithaa: haha. other half. other half. other half. nyeh nyeh! yay i dun look like a minah. yay. but my hair sucks. dun see me in school.

Aziz: Store my mind in a box? haiyoyoyo. u think too deep bro. i told u so. hahha. and ure not making sense about the Pearl Jam song. haha. lagu boleh mcm sour prune eh? hahhaa. btw i hate sour prunes.

Ditri (kak): haha. study is now on hold. haha. blom officially posted to a school ah.

Duan: I never torture him lah! hahaha. he does all this willingly. ahaha. im making my card as soon as im posted to my new JC. :) i dont like the hair. hahhaa. and why wud u want to be a sponge seh? hahaha.

Fana: eek. i cancelled Sentosa outing lah beb. apologies. and my hair is NOT wow. pfft. sigh.

Hannah: haha. i rock! yay! haha. so anyway, im linking u orkay?

Husna: hahhaa. touching smouching eh? ehehe. im linking u ok? thanks for the compliments! :D

Malihha: ahahha. my bro keeps calling u mak Leha. wahahha. oh oh and my hair sucks lah. u saw wat. its kapppooott. sighness.

Narda: Hi! hahaha.

Nas: Huuarghhaa. dah jumpa pon. klaka lah farez. and i love u too ok? *hugs u back*

Pig: MY HAIR SUCKS. siiigghhh. i never show u cuz i noe i can never buy it. hahahhha.

Salbiah: hahaha. ure back bini! Panjang nyer entry kau. hahha. btw my hair sucks. and i miss you.

Waga Waga: Yes yes i do love that song. makes me go all gooey. hehe.

Xiuz: yes last kiss is damn nice. heh. so anyway, my hair is NOT fine. and shopping is good (if u have the moolah that is). haha.

I had earlier planned to start of this entry with Spongebob, but nehh something more important came up;





Truthfully i have no idea whether i like it or not. Hmm. Its something new, but i strictly told the auntie

"Auntie ah, You cut make sure can tie ok? I in school later cannot tie very hot lah auntie. somemore my hair very frizzy, later kapooot! ok auntie ah?"

And the auntie had given me a firm nod and said

"Yah lah! Auntie know. You just sit there and relax ok? Stop moving and talking too much. Hard for auntie to cut your hair. later senget then you complain."

And now my hair cant be tied. I dont know whether its good or bad, since she did thin it and layer it, but somehow my past keep coming back to me; the mats in the bus shouting

"Eh Eh! Anak pontianak siak!" (Eh Eh! Pontianak's daughter!)

Bah! Shuddup all you mats before i poke all your pierced noses and your carrotty tapered pants. Pfft.



So anyway, i watched Spongebob Squarepants the movie today!! hahahahaa. It was freakingly hilarious, and i was laughing like nobody's business through out the whole movie, alongside with a million small kids and their parents. An at first reluctant other half came out of the theatre amused, said

"Haha. i didnt know such stupid cartoons can be so funny."

So go watch it! go go! I'd like to ramble on and on about the parts that i like, but i shall not since i want all of you to watch it. heh. More info can be read here.



So like all of you might have guessed by now, i went out with the other half again today. We went the usual places, but then decided to check out the Excelsior (spell?) Hotel at City Hall, where Luthier Music just moved in. We ended up checking out the guitars at Davis, and i found the Doraemon guitar most amusing.

Priced at $800 and the brand being Paul Reed Smith, the guitar is not something to be sniggered at. But Doraemon? hahaha. So cute. Reminds me of the many times i'd use to sit in front of the boobtube at 7pm and turn the channel to TV1 (a Malaysian channel). haha.

Oops i have a conference call with Mally and Nassy in 15 minutes. Gotta go then. Oh yes, i do realise ive been going out every single day for the past few weeks, and for the note, mom isnt too happy with me. *shrugs* hehe.

Good night.

Aaaah. I so abhor going to town with Ashrithaa and Claire, although i do look forward to it (as oxymoronic as that statement seems). haha.

The reason why i hate going town with them is because they'll enter all this nice shops like Surf(something), or Topshop or Ripcurl etc, and my eyes will go googoogaagaa, itchy fingers pulling out fabric after fabric, swirling thoughts and temptations playing in my mind, but i'll later get snapped back to reality, upon realising that i have no

$ Kaching $

So yeah, yesterday due to some constraints i could only meet them at 4pm. Hee. So sorry guys you had to wait for an hour at the bus stop. So yeah, the moment i reached Queensway, i ran to the busstop, and had to run to catch the bus which they were boarding.

I was greeted by a (very) red Claire, Josephine, who went freaking canoeing early in the morning at Sentosa (yes they're nuts), and not to forget Ashrithaa. The initial plan was to get to Little India so that Josephine can trim her eyebrows, but after me and rhino psychoed her, she decided against it. So we dropped halfway and took another bus to Orchard.

Waaahh. My heart strings are tugging real hard. My Wishlist:

- That pink Ripcurl long-sleeved blouse.
- That white Roxy handbag.
- That black-rimmed Topshop shades.
- That Topshop girl boxer with pink font.
- That Topshop black bikini with rainbow stripes.
- That Topshop dangly earrings.
- That Topshop necklace.
- That pointed anybrand shoe. (BOUGHT)

Ok with all that Roxy and Ripcurl and Topshop, Hakim said that i am turning into a Minah. I wanted to slap him right there and then on MSN, but when i thought about it, i realised that it could be true what he said, if you just look at my clothing taste now.

But Fadhilah = Minah?

Heck yeah i know it rhymes, buuut me? Minah? Oh God Forbid. haha. I am very confused. I want to wear all this lovely pieces of clothings, i want to look pretty and ladylike, i want to be like all my pretty cousins and friends, but i dont want to be a Minah. So how? Opinions please? *tears hair out*

Erps. Pardon that diversion. So anyway, i had to leave by 6, so i went off. I later learned that Ashrithaa left a few minutes after i did, and Josephine and Claire had planned to go KBOXing till 5am, and then head back to Claire's estate, where they would continue suntanning beside the pool. With the sleepy eyes that they had on their faces throughout the orchard trip, i wonder how they're gonna survive staying up till dawn. pfft. haha.

So yeah, please give your two cents about the Minah thing. heh. If its very long, post it to me. Bye! Time to bathe and meet the other half. yayness.

The significant other (wahaha. take that rhino and astroboy!) let me listen to this song on his iPod. Its quite an old song, but me, being emoish as usual, moisted my eyes whilst listening to the lyrics.

Pearl Jam - Last Kiss
Oh where, oh where can my baby be?
The Lord took her away from me.
She's gone to heaven, so I've got to be good,
So I can see my baby when I leave this world.

We were out on a date in my daddy's car,
we hadn't driven very far.
There in the road, straight ahead,
a car was stalled, the engine was dead.
I couldn't stop, so I swerved to the right.
I'll never forget, the sound that night--
the screamin tires, the bustin glass,
the painful scream that I-- heard last.

Oh where, oh where can my baby be?
The Lord took her away from me.
She's gone to heaven, so I've got to be good,
So I can see my baby when I leave this world.

When I woke up, the rain was pourin down.
There were people standin all around.
Somethin warm runnin through my eyes,
but somehow I found my baby that night.
I lifted her head, she looked at me and said,
Hold me darlin just a little while.
I held her close, I kissed her--our last kiss.
I found the love that i knew i would miss
well now she's gone, even though I hold her tight
I lost my love, my life - that night.

Oh where, oh where can my baby be?
The Lord took her away from me.
She's gone to heaven so I've got to be good,
So I can see my baby when I leave this world.

Nyeh nyeh nyeh. Sometimes i cant help it if every entry has his name. I mean, if i go out with him on that day, then my blog entry surely would have him in it, wouldnt it? Like for example, if i go out with you today (whoever you are), then my blog entry would have your name in it.

Doh.

*Grins to herself and hugs herself tightly.*
Goodnight.

I recall the other half asking me

"In your memory box has nothing of mine right?"

And to that i had stood in silence, and drawled out a

"Yeah.. Nothing of yours.. Except for that letter you wrote on our blog and i had printed it myself."

He gave me a sheepish grin, and apologised. That meer question had got me thinking; after 9 months, how come he has given me nothing to put in my memory box? After much thought (and whacking my head in conclusion), i realised that the memories he gave me cannot be fit into a box.

The memories he gave me are everywhere in abundant; when i hold my handphone, i hold a posession that he had given me. The next time i hold a cue, i hold the knowledge and skill he had entrusted unto me. When i look around, i see the many things we have talked about. The better person i am now is because of his constant naggings.
And the list just continues.

Its not the material things that matter. Its not the things that can be held and kept in a box. Its the things that the person has engraved into your mind and heart. Things that you dont need something to remind you of it.



Am i making sense? Haha..